****ing Telemarketer


Actual call …

Annoyed Person (Me) hitting pause on Tosh.0: “Hello.”

Annoying Person: “Hello, Mister Tore … um … Mister Tor Chi Chi?”

TorChiChi: “Not interested.”

Click. Dial tone.

One minute later …

TorChiChi: “Hello.”

Annoying but Persistent Person: “With all due respect, you hanged up and you don’t even know what you’re not interested in. Now, I’m calling from the Energy Commission and we …”

TorChiChi: “I’m sorry. What was your name?”

Annoying but Persistent Person: “Mister Clark. Like I was saying …”

TorChiChi: “So, Mister Cock, now that I know what you’re calling about, guess what?”

Mister Cock: “I said ‘Clark’ … Mister Clark.”

TorChiChi: “I’m still not interested, Mister Cock.”

Click. Dial tone. Unpause.

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About the author

Author of humorous essays about relationships and lifestyles.